somewhere between wrong and almost

i wore rings to quiet the shake that only comes when you're near.

said your name like a bruise i kept pressing just to feel.

i meant to stay quiet. 

let time do the forgetting. 

but your voice lives in the gaps of my days, 

like sunlight through blinds; 

uninvited, soft, still burning on blue lit flames.

i think i wanted to see 

if your eyes still held that night, 

the one we promised not to carry.

but promises are delicate things,

and i, 

i break what i can’t name.

you touched my hand, once, 

like brushing dust off glass, 

and it shattered just the same.

we didn’t do it. 

not again. 

but we folded into silence 

like it was safer than honesty.

i still don’t know what this is. 

only that i miss what we almost were, 

and fear what we could become.