heaven where it's quiet, lying next to you

it was perfect in so many ways

calluses touch each other

and i found myself praying that he'll save me from the cold

when his words makes me shivers and shoving it back down my throat

the waves takes me back

to the start of january back in twenty-three

kind and fun is my faith in what you are

blinding me with it and now realizing it's all a disguise

and you find me holding onto us

softly asking to not bite back the hands that needs you

i called you out; hoarse and i drag it out,

“and right now i need you,”

once again, it seems perfect

in so many ways, it got me hooked

put my round glasses on the dresser

caught me lacking, blinded right on the iris

hickeys and dark bruises around the neck

you choked me as if i'm trying to confess my sins

as we're fornicating, ignore the heavy breathing

and i could stop loving you if i tried,

i'm trying, i'm trying, i'm trying.

sept 3rd ‘24