“now what?”

i said come over,

straight away you're here with your wool sweater,

you said, “now what?”

i shrug my shoulders, “now what?”

lays down besides me, thinking of a hug or a kiss,

i blinked and blinked,

now your hand's under my shirt,

i said, “now what?”

intoxicating me as much as you could,

“it's nothing,” leaves under your breath,

“don't worry,” as our lips go wet,

you hold me tight, it's quarter after eleven,

getting up, ready to leave my bed,

and now what?

declined calls and unchecked messages,

you go around, go act like it didn't hurt,

your eyes saw everything and me,

everything now excluding me,

and now what?

your perfume stains my shirt,

passing the basketball here and there,

watching the hours flew by,

blinked, now your best friend's touching me,

and now what?

july 3th ‘24

p.s; richard siken wrote “in the dream i don't tell anyone, you put your head in my lap” in ‘crush’ and i went running to the notes app to write this.